There is no such thing as an A+ in parenting – but there is a Triple-P. Since 1999 the Triple P program has been offering Townsville parents sanity. See how it’s going in 2023.
There are four parenting styles and each involves a pattern of behaviour parents use when interacting with and raising their child. Alison Bogle, with Austin Family magazine, joins us with more.
An increasing number of parents are looking for advice, and the internet is throwing an abundance of information back at them.
Nurse and midwife Judy Reichman coordinates the Triple P (positive parenting program) in Townsville and said she often meets people who’ve lost their confidence in parenting.
“Parenting is hard, but we all want the best for our kids,” Ms Reichman said.
“Our primary goal is to see our little people grow into the best versions of themselves and we know the best way to do that is to strengthen and empower their primary caregivers and family unit.”
Nurse Judy Reichman with 18-month-old Timeha Filifili. (L-R) Seleah, 7, and Mahalia Filifili, 4, with mother Desaree Byrens. Shalissa Quayle and son Jasper, 6, at the Aitkenvale Library. Picture: Evan Morgan
The program has been running in Townsville since 1999 via the Child Youth and Family Health Service, which has Triple P trained and accredited staff.
Ms Reichman has taught the program in both Toowoomba and Townsville and said she noticed one big difference between the two cities.
“People are bombarded with parenting information now and there isn’t a lot of extended family around for them to lean on for real-world advice,” she said.
“In Toowoomba 90 per cent of people had extended family close by. In Townsville it’s the opposite because we have the hospital, FIFO, the army and all these transient workforces.”
Ms Reichman said unfortunately parenting didn’t come naturally to people – especially those who’ve never spent time around children before having their own.
“We see a lot of competing information being thrown at parents and they’re left to filter through it all,” she said.
“Some parents like coming to us to have that face-to-face interaction.”
Ms Reichman said during the Child Youth and Family Health Service’s monthly drop-in library sessions, she can see anywhere from four to 60 parents.
“The sessions where we talk about eating solids and sleep settling are the most popular, I think because families want to get it right,” she said.
“There is so much pressure for kids to have extracurriculars and for both parents to be working, that there isn’t much time for families to be families anymore.”
Triple P first began at the University of Queensland, but it’s expanded to over 30 different countries.
Triple P International head of training Alan Ralph said they never expected the parenting program to take off in the US like it did.
“When you think about it, when you’ve got a child throwing a tantrum in a supermarket, it doesn’t matter if you’re in Tehran or Beijing, it’s all the same,” Dr Ralph said.
“Healthy children become resilient, which they really need in our rapidly changing environment.”
Triple P tailors different programs for babies, children with anxiety and teenagers.
Here are a few Triple P tips:
– Be available, this doesn’t mean being there all the time, but when a child approaches you to ask a question or show you something, stop what you’re doing and give them your full attention.
– Make your home child-safe, so you’re not always saying ‘don’t do that’ or ‘don’t touch that’ and you can relax more
– Pay attention and praise a child when they are helpful
– Discipline assertively, react quickly, be calm and clear
– Don’t accidentally reward misbehaviour with attention (reasoning, arguing, repeating yourself) or by giving in
– And the big one – be realistic – don’t ask a three-year-old to clean up a messy room on their own, because they can’t