March/April 2023 Limerick Laughs Winner and Runners-up

In sharing she’s not at all versed.
The hissing and claws are the worst.
I’m eager to drink
But it’s better, I think,
If we allow you to go first.

Congratulations to Paxton Grant of Hightown, Virginia, who won $25 for this limerick describing this Robert L. Dickey cover image from our February 27, 1926, issue.

If you’d like to enter the Limerick Laughs Contest for our upcoming issue, submit your limerick via our online entry form.

Here are some more great limerick entries from this contest, in no particular order:

Said a white dog, “When all’s said and done,
That small cat is a son of a gun.
Don’t be fooled by the bow
He’s as hard as nails, so
I think we should both simply run.”
—Bob Turvey, Stoke Bishop, Bristol, United Kingdom

Two stray dogs in the woods made a beeline
To a bowl they espied past the tree line,
When they greeted a cat,
She said, “Don’t call me that!
When I’m wearing my bow I’m a feline.”
—Sjaan VandenBroeder, Stockton, California

“And since when is fresh cream fido fare?
Put a snout in my bowl – if you dare.
Do I gnaw on your bones,
Or take walks with Miss Jones?
This is Kitty’s and Kitty don’t share!”
—Anthony Holmes, Launceston, Cornwall, United Kingdom

These tough little guys from the pound
Felt delight at the milk they had found.
But this cute little foe
Soon let them both know
That there wasn’t enough to go round.
—Don Baynham, Garland, Texas

Said Scot to his buddy, “I think
We should just let the cat have this drink.
Who thought that there was
Such a wee ball of fuzz,
That could raise such an almighty stink!”
—Marcia Gunnett Woodard, Swayzee, Indiana

A kitten they brought as a gift?
You can see that I really am miffed.
It ate all our food,
And I’m in the mood
For felicide. D’you get my drift?
—Rudy Landesman, New York City, New York

To communicate well with a terrier,
A kitty cat faces a barrier.
A meow won’t convey
What it’s trying to say:
“Yo I’m eating — the fewer the merrier!”
—Jeff Foster, San Francisco, California

With milk, the two dogs were quite smitten.
But apparently, they were forgettin’
A minor hiccup
In the plan to lick up
The milk, without waking the kitten!
—Madeline Male, Fairway, Kansas

Mr. Barkley and Charlie were smitten,
So they went and adopted a kitten.
They chose Smudge at first sight —
She’s half black and half white,
So she’d look like their mixture and fit in.
—Jennifer Klein, Israel