Dad – a son’s first friend, a daughter’s first love; the relationship between child and father can shape all those that come afterwards, but what makes a good dad? One Canberra dad and artist reflects on the different journeys dads take in the multi-disciplinary production, In His Words: Voices of Fatherhood at Canberra’s The Street theatre, 23-25 June.
In his first major work, Creswick (aka Liam Budge) has created a documentary accompanied by a live musical response to be performed for the first time in its entirety at the premiere on 23 June.
Moving back to Australia after having worked in the US, Creswick wanted to explore and create, but was constricted by pandemic lockdowns and restrictions. Spending most of his time with his young son, the artist started taking home movies, which got him thinking about fatherhood – his own journey, his own father, and the fathers who surround him.
With the support of The Street, he contacted around 100 fathers from different backgrounds, age demographics, sexual orientations and family dynamics. Working his way through the pre-filming chats, Creswick chose nine fathers to work with on the project, inspired by their conversations and approaches to child-rearing. He says it became apparent that what shaped different men’s approaches to fatherhood was their role models, relationships towards masculinity, and vulnerability.
“Each father had these very specific experiences that related to how they father or how they view fatherhood, and these were the things that I made sure to kind of really tap into when we were having these conversations,” says Creswick.
One of the fathers featured in the project is Sam Burns, dad to three young girls. His story of fatherhood is one that you won’t come across often; he grew up in a “toxic masculine environment” and then went on to study to become a Catholic priest. Sam now wants to break some of the patterns he was exposed to and raise kind, compassionate, formidable, and fierce young women.
“My Catholic upbringing has given me a beautiful framework and philosophy of love and hope. What I’m really focusing on for my children is rather than encouraging religion, to give them a framework of hope and love; I want them to have those frameworks internally so that they don’t need to rely on something external,” says Sam.
Having a strong role model in his own father, Creswick describes his dad as a great example of masculinity, who helped inspire the way he lives, as well as his parenting style. He says role models come in and out of our lives in many different shapes.
“The way in which we father is often informed by people who are not necessarily fathers in our lives, but just masculine male roles is feeding into that positive sense of masculinity that, in turn, then allows us to father in better ways,” says Creswick.
For Sam, he has adopted those aspects of his own father, peers and priestly role models who inspired him, and moulded them in a way that works for him.
“My focus as a father is to model myself on those good aspects, really honestly see the flaws in those role models, and try and improve as best as I can on that,” he says.
According to Creswick, the production is for everyone, not just fathers. He believes different aspects of the production will appeal to different people.
“It’s for anyone with an interest in human connection, it’s for anyone with an interest in masculinity and it’s for anyone with an interest in the way that art can explore these concepts,” he says.
“If there are any expectant fathers, this would be an amazing thing for them to sit through and watch. To be able to see men talk about their journey of going from being a son and a partner, and then all of a sudden being a father and grappling with what that means for their life,” says Sam.
Believing fatherhood is less represented than motherhood through art, Creswick wants to open the platform up more and showcase the importance of vulnerable conversations. He says all the fathers involved in the project are vulnerable and honest about their own experiences.
“These positive role models of masculinity and also radical acceptance of their place within the fatherhood journey – not to say that everyone is a perfect example of a father, and everyone would accept this, but we’re all on this journey together, trying to be the best father that we can be,” says Creswick.
Both Sam and Creswick believe that fatherhood is a personal experience, one that is different for everyone, and that there is no one right way to be a father.
“You have to be in touch with your strengths and weaknesses and use those to love and care for those beautiful vulnerable people in front of you … I want to be the best person I can be and show up with intention every day and continually grow to be the best person I can be, to love myself properly. Then I have all the tools I need to be able to love and care for these little people and help them be the best person they can be,” says Sam.
“We all come from different backgrounds, we all have different approaches to how we want to show up as fathers, but I think it’s a quest for learning as you go; to be able to honestly look at weaknesses in a way that you can make changes,” says Creswick.
In His Words: Voices of Fatherhood premiers at The Street, City West, 23-25 June; thestreet.org.au
Canberra Weekly would love to hear from you about a story idea in the Canberra and surrounding region. Click here to submit a news tip.